Neglecting The Study Of Our Own Characters

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I just read this essay by Thoreau. I was going to follow his advice and write down my thoughts and feelings; since my early 20’s, journaling has been a big part of my life — my own spiritual discipline.

I decided to type out his essay, instead. I figured that, perhaps, it would be easier for me to comprehend. And, maybe you might read it.

As those pieces which the painter sketches for his own amusement in his leisure hours are often superior to his most elaborate productions, so it is that the ideas often suggest themselves to us spontaneously, as it were, far surpassing in beauty those which arise in the mind upon applying ourselves to any particular subject. Hence, could a machine be invented which would instantaneously arrange on paper each idea as it occurs to us, without any exertion on our part, how extremely useful would it be considered! The relation between this and the practice of keeping a journal is obvious. But yet, the preservation of our scattered thoughts is to be considered an object but of minor importance.

Every one can think, but comparatively few can write, can express thoughts. Indeed, how often do we hear one complain of his inability to express what he feels! How many have occasion to make the following remark, “I am sensible that I understand this perfectly, but am not able to find words to convey my idea to others.”

But if each one would employ a certain portion of each day in looking back upon the time which has passed, and in writing down his thoughts and feelings, in reckoning up his daily gains, that he may be able to detect whatever false coins have crept into his coffers, and, as it were, in settling accounts with his mind, not only would his daily experience be greatly increased, since his feelings and ideas would thus be more clearly defined, but he would be ready to turn over a new leaf, having carefully perused the preseeding one, and would not continue to glance carelessly over the same page, without being able to distinguish it from a new one.

Most of us are apt to neglect the study of our own characters, thoughts, and feelings, and for the purpose of forming our own minds, look to others, who should merely be considered as different editions of the same great work. To be sure, it would be well for us to examine the various copies, that we might detect any errors, but yet, it would be foolish for one to borrow a work which he possessed himself, but had not perused.

In fine, if we endeavored more to improve ourselves by reflection, by making a business of thinking, and giving our thoughts form and expression we should be led to “read not to contract and confute, nor to believe and take for granted, nor to find talk and discourse, but to weigh and consider.”

I’ve Been At My New Job For 60 Days

By in Parenting, Religion, Spirituality Tags: , ,

 

I bought some Green Superfood, “Your daily greens plus nutritious fruits & veggies for health & wellness” because I rarely take a lunch break because I want to help these children.

It’s been 60 days.

It’s been a blur.

Numbers.

Fourteen thousand volunteers.

Forty-one states.

Six countries.

Over 300 camps and mentoring clubs.

Over 100 adoptions and foster care placements.

Mostly, those children. Ten thousand that we reach each year at our mentoring clubs and camps. Six to twelve-year-olds. All neglected. Most abused. Physically and/or sexually.

All abandoned.

Every day quickly disappears because the work is so great.

So much opportunity. I was in Sacremento last week for doing advocacy work. I will be in DC next week.

We are keeping people off the streets, out of prison, out of the sex trade.

We are reaching them before it’s too late.

 

I wanted to furnish my office in the first week 60 days ago. I got rid of the 80’s cherrywood stuff. I have this one desk, which is an old table I brought from home. And the oriental (is it okay to say that?) rug. And these two chairs that were left over. I plan to get rid of the chairs and get some furniture that suits me.

But the work is so great. How do we reach more children? One mother who adopted one of the kids said her daughter would have been dead had we not stepped in. Her name is Samantha. I have a picture of her on my desk from her first camp. She is an adult now. Flourishing. Leading efforts to reach foster children in her state.

Urgency.

We want to reach all of these children. All 400,000+ plus of them. Take them out of their homes. Give them their first birthday party. Show them the love and care and nurture which all children need but not all children get. Mentor them throughout the year. Be there for them because, too often, there is nobody else.

I need to furnish my office soon. But it’s more important to work to help these children.

I want to make this a better post. But it’s more important that I get back to work to help these children.

If you can, go to amazon smile. Google it. Then search for Royal Family Kids. Make us your charity. Amazon will give a portion of every single purchase to us so we can reach more kids.

 

 

Ludwig Wittgenstein – Enneagram Five

By in Parenting, Spirituality Tags: ,

Reading about Wittgenstein (1889-1951), who I studied at UCLA. He created the notion of language games, which I didn’t appreciate learning about at the time, and I still don’t like very much.

But, I’m intrigued with this guy. He was one of the most influential philosophers of the 20th century.

And…

Devised a new kind of sewing machine as a child.

Then studied engineering in Berlin.

Went to Manchester, England, and studied aeronautics.

Didn’t really speak English, but figured it out.

Found out he was actually interested in mathematics.

So he met Bertrand Russell and G.E Moore in Cambridge and became one of the most annoying and intriguing students, arguing with professors and winning their respect for his tireless devotion to understanding.

Then was drawn to an isolated farmhouse in Norway where he wrote philosophy.

But in 1914 decided to volunteer for the Austro-Hungarian army.

Was a prisoner of war in Italy where he completed his Tractatus-Logico-Philosophicus, a pure masterpiece in modern day logic and philosophy of language.

Happened upon Leo Tolstoy and decided to devote himself to the Gospel and an abstemious life as a village teach in his homeland of Lower Austria.

Wanted to become a monk, but decided not to.

Instead, became an assistant gardener in a monastery.

Became interested in architecture.

Designed houses.

Then decided to get his Ph.D.

P.S. His father was and extremely wealthy steel magnate. When he died in 1913, 24 year old Ludwig became one of the richest men in Europe. But he soon became disinterested in the wealth — not wanting to spend that which he had not earned — and gave 100% of it away to relatives.

Learn more about the Enneagram and the test: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com

My Next Campaign: Children

By in Parenting, Politics, Religion, Spirituality, Teenagers Tags: , , ,

I am humbled and pleased to announce that I have been named President and Chief Executive Officer of Royal Family Kids, Inc. (RFK) — a California non-profit organization that brings healing and support to thousands of foster children each year who are victims of abuse, neglect, and abandonment. 

As you might know, during my run for U.S. Congress, I received the formal endorsement of human rights crusader, Bill Browder. His story had captured my heart and, ironically, will now serve as a driving force behind my new work.

Bill, who founded an investment firm in Moscow in the 1990’s, was later named the top investment fund manager in the world. But on November 16th, 2009, when his tax attorney, Sergei Magnitsky, was tortured and murdered by associates of Vladimir Putin, he made a vow to seek justice for those responsible. He gave up his lucrative career to crusade on behalf of the many victims of Vladimir Putin and his accomplices. 

In 2012, Bill’s work compelled the U.S. government to impose sanctions on the responsible Russian oligarchs. A new bill, called The Magnitsky Act, received overwhelming support from both houses of Congress.

Vladimir Putin immediately “retaliated” by banning the adoptions of thousands of Russian orphans to American families. 

Because many of these orphans suffered from birth defects, fetal alcohol syndrome, HIV, and other ailments, many were effectively sentenced to death, given a lack of medical resources in Russia. Tens of thousands of Russians took to the streets in protest of yet another one of Putin’s gruesome acts.

As a former Executive Director of an international youth campaign that encouraged and inspired thousands of at-risk teens, and as a former executive with the March of Dimes, a foundation devoted to helping newborns with birth defects and illness, you can imagine how Bill’s story touched me, especially Putin’s decision to penalize innocent foster children. 

As I learned more about these orphans during the campaign I often asked myself, How might I use my influence to help the kinds of desperate children that Putin violated? 

My answer came in mid-June when I received an email from an RFK representative who asked if I’d consider this role, and meet with their search committee. I took the meeting. For the past two months, I’ve been involved in a long process of informational meetings with RFK leadership, and many interviews. 

Earlier this month, I was selected to lead the organization as the new President and CEO.

I really don’t have words to describe this organization. I’ve honestly never seen anything like it. This video is just a small sample of the work RFK does at its 5-day camps, treating children like Samantha as “royalty.”

During my campaign, I learned too well how divisive today’s political environment can be. But we can all agree on one thing. We can all agree that all minor children are innocent, especially those suffering from abuse, neglect, and abandonment. And given that approximately 80% of our prison inmates were former foster care children, and 60% of all child sex trafficking victims have histories in the child welfare system, I could think of nothing more compelling for my next step than leveraging my advocacy convictions — to bring real change to countless children.

Working in partnership with Child Protective Services in 40 states, RFK has helped change the lives of over 100,000 kids, over the past 30 years. This year alone, we will have encouraged and mentored approximately 10,000 kids. Like Samantha, 

But with approximately 500,000 foster children in the system today, the work before us is daunting.

Three weeks ago, I attended my first RFK event, a 5-day camp with 71 children, ages 6 – 12. I served as a volunteer along with over 100 others who gave up their vacation time to work all day and night in 95-degree heat, mentoring and serving these precious children. I wrote about two of my experiences here and here.  

Each camp has a “Birthday Party” with gifts and cake and ice cream and games — because so many of them had never had a birthday party before.

I learned that many camp counselors and volunteers end up adopting the children they mentored at camp.

The highlight of the week was when one of the boys at the camp, an 11-year-old named Miguel, who was a victim of physical abuse and severe neglect, asked me if I would be his father. 

There are no words to describe how that moment — I realized there and then that hundreds of thousands of abandoned children like Miguel are in such desperate need of hope, affirmation, positive experiences, and love.

This new work of mine will be my part in helping those innocent children.

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To learn more, about Bill Browder, please visit www.billbrowder.com.

To learn more about Royal Family Kids, please visit www.rfk.org.

A Week With 71 Foster Children, Part II

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There are two older couples at Royal Family Kids Camp. They are the camp “Grandmas and Grandpas.” Because many of these children, given they have no parents, have no grandparents. And as many of you know, grandparents can be a very good thing for children.

I wouldn’t be who I am today without the remarkable influence of my grandparents.

So, one of the camp activities includes grandma and grandpa time. We take our kids into a room — 10 of them, just boys. We sit on chairs in a semi-circle. We are facing the two couples, the “grandparents.” They are in front of a fireplace. They are older and married.

The kids are squeamish, as always. The grandparents introduce themselves, not as “Bob” or “Mary,” or “Mr. Thomson” and “Mrs. Thompson,” but as “Grandpa Bob” and “Grandma Mary.”

As they speak, you can see that the objective is to model kindness, calm, wisdom — something these children see little of.

They gently, with such calm and patience and eye contact and all that good modeling, ask the children to listen. I’m inside so I can’t wear my sunglasses but tears stream down my face because I’m sure these children have never experienced anything like this; they act out, and these older authority figures gently steer them in the right direction.

I hate that sometimes that I can be so emotional. I got it from my maternal grandfather, my Nonno. He was strong and gruff and full of life, and he cried whenever the circumstances warranted it.

You could see the children being tamed.

One of the grandmas begins to read them a story. She sits and reads and shows them the pictures. It’s a story about a boy who grew up a slave in the Deep South. His name was Denver. And later ran away to a big city. He became homeless. He was illiterate. He had no family.

He became angry because he “wasn’t like the other people.”

Grandma gently told the children, with poise and grace, how sadness can turn to anger when life is hard. All implication, no sermon, nothing about their respective circumstances.

The 20 eyes fixed on grandma with each word.

The story ends with a couple reaching out to Denver. They teach him to read. They love him. He becomes a responsible and respectful member of society because he chooses to not let sadness and anger rule him. He starts an outreach to the homeless. He is honored in the White House by President Obama.

And the moral of the book is about how we are all uniquely different, and nobody is better than someone else.

One of the grandpas takes out his Taylor guitar. He sings a cheesy song about a father’s love. I’m cringing a bit; the kids aren’t. I keep thinking about how these kids live on video games and smartphones and here are these four old people singing this cheesy song and how it’s not relevant.

Apparently, it was. Because they are paying full attention.

The song ends. Then the grandpa says, “I’ve never known my dad. I never met him. I don’t know his name or what he looks like.”

I cry some more.

Four hands are raised. He calls on one of the boys.

“Me too.”

The I hear three others say “me too.”

One says, “I know my father’s name. His name is Richard. And I have a picture of him. But I’ve never met him.”

The grandpa who doesn’t know his father then talks with such precision and grace about how God is a father that will never let us down.

One boy talks about how parents can let us down but “if you trust in God he never leaves us.”

I don’t even know how the Grandparent time ended. But after it did, one of the camp photographers (there are a few of them) asked the boys if they wanted to have a picture taken with “your new grandparents.” The cynic in me (I’m sorry to admit this) immediately said, “These cool, hardened, customers are not going to want a picture taken with these old, white, folks.”

One of the grandmas pointed to me as a mob rushed to be first in line to help navigate the photo session. I had to find a way to back them up so the shoot can begin.

One after one, the boys sat on a chair, with each grandparent couple to his left and right.

The smiles of the boys. We can’t show pictures of them. But those smiles.

They will never leave my heart.

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